Why I chose to self-publish my memoir (and what I’ve learned)
by Lisa Edwards
My name is Lisa Edwards and I’ve had a twenty-five-year career in the book industry, publishing some of its best-known children’s fiction and non-fiction, including The Hunger Games, His Dark Materials and Horrible Histories. I wrote the first draft of my memoir, Cheat Play Live, in India three years ago and immediately started working with a friend who is an agent, grafting towards the goal of getting my book published by a trade house.
But what I didn’t know was that the first stage of memoir-writing is therapy. It is your raw self poured on to the page, and that self won’t necessarily be the one you should show to the world. I poured a lot of bitterness, anger and cynicism onto those pages and the response I got was that there was a ‘likeability’ issue; in other words, readers wouldn’t like me. I’d also written out everything chronologically with no heed to a reader’s experience. No reader really wants to read an ‘this happened and then this happened’ memoir and I was initially told my story didn’t have enough of a ‘hook’. The book was gripping for those people who knew me but I was told that it might not carry for those who didn’t.
Write from the heart, not the ego
I retreated back into my shell for a few years, telling myself that the writing had purely been for my own benefit, that I had learned a lot about myself in the process and my role in everything that had happened in my life to date. Job done. But two years later, I started to think about patterns in my story, about ways in which I’d acted that repeated themselves and shaped my life. I met someone who told me to rewrite my story from the heart (a special person you can read about in the book) and take out anything that was written by my ego. I spent the next couple of months combing through the text looking for traces of my ego and removed them (I lost 10,000 words!). I walked by the sea and realised that the major milestones of my story had taken place on or near a series of beaches, and I decided to rework the story around those locations. There, finally, was my ‘hook’.
Redefine what success means to you
After I left the corporate world of publishing, I redefined what success meant for me, and knew it wasn’t fame and fortune, rank and status. It was living an honest, authentic life and helping others through my editorial work and my yoga teaching. I knew my book could help other people who were living in unhappy marriages, stressful workplaces and living with grief and alcohol addiction. I decided to publish my book myself as soon as I could and not wait to be chosen by an agent or publisher. For one thing, I knew that the climate wasn’t right for yet another memoir about a white middle-aged woman finding herself on an Indian beach. I knew I’d get knocked back again and potentially be hanging on forever. I was not in this to make money (that’s the ego talking) and just wanted to get on with it as soon as possible. So I decided not to show it to anyone.
Own and control your story
I reworked my story around the beach theme about two weeks before I published. This would not have happened if I was in line at a trade publishing house. Indeed, my title and whole cover design changed about a month before publication. The one I ended up with was more authentic and honest to the book. I have my designer, Clare Baggaley, to thank for that. This also led to me deciding not to use a pseudonym. I was concerned that I would get trolled for the ‘CHEAT’ part of my book where I admitted to infidelity, but in reality, hardly anyone even mentions it. I could have hidden behind a pseudonym but I’m so glad I didn’t – one of the greatest joys of being a self-published memoirist is owning your story.
I published on the worst day you can choose to launch a book. It was a Saturday in August – my mother’s birthday. It felt absolutely creatively and emotionally right for me to choose that date, and if I’d been with a publishing house there would be no way they’d have let me do it. I wouldn’t have let me do it! But this is one of the greatest bonuses for self-published authors: we are in control.
Stop trying to be rich and famous
I stopped thinking about moneyand sales numbers as my end goal. Instead, I thought about how many people I could reach through my own contacts and how far I could take the book. I called it my ‘All the world’s a village’ strategy, and I knew at the start that if my book helped 100 people put their life in perspective, I’d be happy. I’ve more than achieved that goal. Think about why you’re sitting waiting to be chosen by a publishing house on the slim (more like micro) chance that you’ll become a rich and famous author. Why wait if you can make a difference now? Why does it have to be a difference of thousands of copies when it can be hundreds? Isn’t 100 people reading your book a real success? Why have we lost sight of that? Does everyone who paints a picture want to be Tracey Emin, or do they do it for love and share their creativity with people who matter?
Promote and sell organically
My promotional strategy was and is an organic one. I knew from my career in publishing that books reached more people when everyone involved bought into the idea. A local cafe supported me while I was writing my book and later offered to promote and sell it. Their sales don’t register anywhere official but it doesn’t matter – the books are reaching an audience through them. My joy comes from delivering new stock (I buy it at cost price from Amazon and IngramSpark) and signing the copies. Their rate of sale increases week by week, actually outperforming Amazon. The same is happening in a flower shop in my hometown in North Wales run by an old school friend. They’re selling copies at a special price opposite the shop that my dad used to own and I love it. That’s success in my eyes.
Manage your expectations
You will be surprised at who comes out of the woodwork to help you during this process – I’ve had help and support from former colleagues and new friends, schoolfriends from back home in Wales, friends of friends, and husbands and wives of friends that I’ve never met. Every time someone messages to tell me that they’ve enjoyed the book I simply ask them to post a review. If they say they’re in a book club I ask them to consider it for the group. These conversations have led to radio, YouTube and podcast interviews, newspaper commissions, a review in a major magazine and lots of leads I’m following up on now. Something new pops up each week (almost every day) and it’s exciting.
I don’t ask ‘cold’ for anything – it never goes well. If people don’t have the desire to support you in the first place, it feels wrong. I’ve only sent out a handful of copies for review – and only two to people I don’t know. Everyone else is in my contacts list.
At the same time, prepare yourself for those whom you thought would support you to go silent. Publishing your own book can make others (even friends) feel jealous. Try not to let their issues pull a cloud over your moment of joy. Publishing your own book is a joy. You don’t need the validation of those people.
Make friends with Amazon
One of the biggest hurdles for self-published authors is having to make friends with Amazon. Despite being non-exclusive with them for three months, I worked out that 98% of my sales came through them. Most of those sales are in paperback (£6.99), not ebook (£4.99).
Initially, I decided not to go exclusive with my ebook because I only wanted to reach readers who actively wanted to read my book, not just have it on their Kindle because it’s free. I have since switched to exclusivity because of the sales breakdown, and the realisation that Amazon don’t support your ebook unless they have the exclusive right to sell it. I’ll review the outcome at the end of the three months and decide whether or not to opt in again. I also wanted a matt-laminated cover and cream paper and that excludes you from the Amazon ‘enhanced distribution’ package so I’ve gone with IngramSpark for that. I’m really happy with the quality of the print-on-demand books they’ve both produced but the difference is in the covers: Ingram give you a thicker board and better colour quality.
It was important to me to have a book that looked and felt good – more important to have a quality product than a cheaply produced one. I barely make any money on either paperback but it doesn’t matter. What matters is that people enjoy the complete reading experience, from the feel of the peachy-soft cover to the authenticity of the story.
As for being on Amazon at all, you have to get over any issues you have with the corporation. They have a platform where people around the world can access my book and I’m grateful for it. I can choose which ‘shelves’ it sits on and move it around accordingly. I can choose what price to sell it at. (My perception prior to this process was that Amazon took all of that control out of authors’ hands). The other platforms don’t even come near Amazon in terms of numbers for debut self-published authors. Plus, in my view, whatever route you take, you are going to encounter a corporation that doesn’t completely align with your values. That’s capitalism.
Ultimately, Amazon has given me ownership of my story, the ability to control its publication and access to it for a wide audience; I can’t complain. But the person who has made all of this happen is me. I have published a book and as I’m child-free by choice, I see it as my baby; it’s in the world, toddling around on its own little feet. I’m watching it grow, little by little every day and I don’t want to miss a moment or a milestone. I have created it and I haven’t had to wait for permission to put it out into the world or validation by a third party. No one can put a price on that.
Cheat Play Live – one woman’s journey to fearlessness and freedomby Lisa Edwards is out now. Buy the book, read the reviews and listen to author interviews here: https://linktr.ee/redwoods1 or sign up to Lisa’s newsletter here.
About the author:
Lisa Edwards is a former publisher (Scholastic, Templar) who is now a freelance writer, editor, agent and yoga teacher. She grew up in North Wales, but has lived mostly in southeast England. She lives in Worthing, West Sussex, where she lives alone and walks by the sea every day. She splits her time between the UK and India.
